Top Five Reasons Cyberbullying can be even more painful than face to face bullying.

1. Cyberbullying can be anonymous.  You may be getting threats or harassing messages and have no idea who is sending them to you.  This can cause you to be distrustful of everyone. “I went to school and looked suspiciously at everyone in my grade because I had no idea who was sending me the messages.”

2. Cyberbullying can be seen by thousands of people in a matter of a few minutes.  It can be embarrassing when one person sees something that makes you feel humiliated, but with technology, it’s like putting it up on an interstate billboard for all to see.  You can’t control who sees it.

3.  Cyberbullying invades your personal space.  Before technology, when you got bullied at school, you could go home at the end of the day and at least have a break from it.  Now with the computer and cell phones, it follows you home and affects you 24/7.  Since some kids even sleep with their phones; they can be getting cruel messages all night long.

4.  Cyberbullying is difficult to stop or retrieve.  Once the “send” button is pressed, you lose all control of what was sent.  As people continue to forward the information, it is like being bullied again and again as the message recirculates.

5.  Cyberbullying can be so vicious!  When you don’t have to see or hear your victim’s pain, it is so easy to lash out and say things you would never say to someone face to face.  Hiding behind a computer screen dehumanizes the interaction.

Cyberbullying:  Cyber bullying is any kind of harassment, insults and humiliation that uses wireless or Internet-related technology in some way to hurt another. Children as young as nine years old are finding themselves harassed via blogs, websites, text-messaging and instant messaging. And, many retaliate by becoming cyber bullies themselves. As the use of technology rises, so do instances of cyber bullying.

Cyber bullying can take many forms. It can be a website where children can vote for the ugliest, most unpopular or fattest girl in the school. It can involve sending private and very personal information or images to others or posting them online for the public to see. Former best friends can betray the other’s trust or passwords. These instances can erode a child’s self esteem and confidence and may lead to later academic difficulties, interpersonal problems, and psychological distress.   Cyber bullying is a growing problem, although few parents are aware that cyber bullying even exists, and unfortunately, children carefully keep it from their parents, sometimes until it is too late

Educating kids about the seriousness of cyber bullying is essential.  They need to be aware that their actions have serious and distressing consequences.  Some students think of bullying as physical and don’t realize that what they are doing online is bullying or how damaging it can be.  We need to equip kids with the skills to handle damaging situations positively and constructively without getting caught up in a dangerous web of aggression.  They may be more tech savvy but they don’t have the life experiences or the concept of the long lasting impact of a digital footprint.  They need adults to guide them in making ethical and moral decisions when online.

The lack of face to face contact in cyber bullying tempts bullies to new levels of cruelty. What used to be a bullying incident amongst six people in school has now evolved into a global broadcast on the internet.  A single incident can be experienced as a multiple attack as the information is recirculated and seen again and again.  Threats and taunts posted on websites are visible throughout the world, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.  One student commented, “You can’t get away from it.”

When young people are being bullied or cyber bullied, it can bring up strong emotions such as anxiety, fear, guilt and hopelessness. Often the victims do not believe that anything will help. There have been instances of children committing suicide after having been targeted by a cyber bully and emotional scars can run deep.  Students need to know that it’s not their fault; they need to be encouraged to reach out to an adult for help,  they need to learn that they can choose responses that will help empower them.

A successful anti-cyber bullying campaign has to involve kids, parents, schools, and the whole community.  Each group has a special role in the solution, but parents have the most leverage.  Awareness and education are key!  Communication is the most powerful way to effectively combat cyber bullying.

We need a proactive policy where all students are taught cyber safety and parents are offered the opportunity to be informed about cyber bullying!