Relationships fail.

Health goes downhill.

People do and say imperfect and hurtful things. 

Things going on in the world are scary.

Life doesn’t go as planned. 

Everyone suffers. 

Everyone has been dealt difficult things to deal with at some point in their life. 

How do we ‘get on’ in this world when things are so ‘tough’??

When we feel like we have no control?

Focus on the two most powerful things you DO have control over: 

How you frame the problem 

How you frame the solution.

If you frame the problem as 

• Insurmountable
• Hopeless
• Never Ending
• Destruction of the world
• Past the point of no return

If you decide to frame the problem that way, Ask Yourself:

How’s that working out for you?

If you frame the solution as

• Impossible
• Out of reach
• Something you could never do 
• Something you’re incapable of experiencing
• A solution that would be too time consuming, so why bother?

If you decide to frame the solution that way—ask yourself—

How’s that working out for you?

There is a better way to frame a problem:

• Everything is figure-out-able (like this problem). 
• The tough stuff (this problem) will teach me something important.
• This (problem) is an opportunity to turn things around.
• The best gifts come wrapped in the roughest sandpaper. 
• I get to decide who I want to be (as I navigate this problem), even when all seems lost.
• A diagnosis is not a death sentence, unless I decide that it is.
• I will take it one day at a time and move forward through this problem. 

There is also a better way to frame a solution 

• I break this down into smaller pieces-what’s one small step forward I can take right now?
• Inch by inch is a cinch, yard by yard it’s hard.
• I’ll be part of the solution, even if the odds seem like they are against me.
• Every day, I’ll show up and do what I can and take pride in that. 
• Someone with worse circumstances than me has made it through this; what were they doing and how can I learn from them? 
• New medical breakthroughs happen, all of the time. 
• Even if I can’t totally fix the world’s biggest problems, I’ll keep working on me.
• Time to think outside the box: what’s a solution I haven’t thought of yet?
• The more I focus on solutions, the more I will increase my feelings of hopefulness. 
• Even is progress is slow, when one solution is created, it leads to additional solutions.

What You Have Control Over

When your relationship is failing, you get to choose how you frame the problem and the solution.

When your bank account is zero, you get to choose how you frame the problem and the solution.

When politics and world news seem out of control, you get to choose how you frame the problem and the solution.

When the scary diagnosis comes through, you get to choose how you frame the problem and the solution.

Framing the problem and solution in a way that feels more hopeful, more possible, is a power that you do have.

You won’t be able to control your partner, your cash flow, your political leaders, or the diagnosis. 

Framing problems and solutions powerfully doesn’t give you control.

Framing problems and solutions powerfully is about deciding that even amid shitty circumstances, you will choose to stay ‘hopeful’…

It is a declaration that you are the one in charge of your fate and your destiny.

It is a declaration in which you choose the best possibilities even amid bad circumstances.

This is a simple truth: 

If you frame problems as unsolvable and solutions as unavailable, then that is what you will continue to get, over and over.

What you believe will become your reality.

Stop focusing on all the things that are wrong and how hard it all is.

Choose to frame your problems as figure-out-able, even if you don’t have it figured out. 

Choose to consciously frame the solutions as possible. 

At the end of the day, we only have control over one thing—OURSELVES.

This is truly the place where all of our power resides. 

Life problems will always occur!

It’s how you perceive and react to the problem that determines your success or failure.

What will you choose?

I made a video on the power of being able to CHOOSE.

This is a video from the FREE mini series I offer on my website–the ART of CPR and it’s the C which stands for CHOOSE…. If you want to receive all 6 videos–sign up for the FREE Mini Series.