10 Ways Visualization Can Help you Create the Life you Want

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visualizeUsing visualization to help you get

more of what you want in life

ONE

When you vividly imagine achieving your goals, you trigger a whole series of subconscious processes which will help you to reach your target.

Each time you visualize you are training your brain to focus on what you want and when you spend more time focusing on it, you become more comfortable with it and your brain starts to find ways to make it happen in the real world.

TWO

You’re already doing it all the time anyway—probably without even realizing it.

Each time you worry about the future, or get anxious about what might happen–you are visualizing…just about the wrong things. (the things you don’t want versus what you do want)

When you consciously visualize about what you want versus what you don’t want, you’ll feel more optimistic and positive. When you feel better, you do better.

THREE

When you visualize, your brain produces Alpha Waves.

When you are in Alpha Brainwave, you experience increased relaxation, focus and pleasure and reduce pain, stress and anxiety.

FOUR

Dr. Maxwell Maltz in his book Psycho Cybernetics noted that your subconscious cannot tell the difference between a real memory and a vividly imagined visualization. (and many research studies have since documented the same thing)

When you visualize you implant new pictures of what you want into your self-image– your subconscious mind thinks you are already the success you dream of being.

This helps increase your confidence and tricks your subconscious mind into helping you achieve your goal.

 

FIVE

It’s FUN to visualize yourself performing at your best or achieving your goals.

It’s FUN to imagine living your dream life in rich, vivid detail.

 

SIX

After you’ve been visualizing for awhile, you’ll start to feel more confident because you’ve repeatedly seen yourself doing or achieving it so many times in your mind.

The more confident you are, the more you’ll take action on the opportunities you see which will help you to have more success.

SEVEN

There are research studies that prove that visualization works. Golfer Tiger Woods, Arnold Schwarzenegger, & Jim Carrey have practiced visualization techniques for decades and attribute it to their success in life.

Olympic athletes, move stars, golfers, basketball players, sales people use visualization to improve their performance.

When you visualize, you create new neural pathways in your brain.  Your brain remembers the successful action which makes it easier for you to experience success in real life.

The more vivid and ‘life-like’ your visualization are, the more your subconscious mind will lead you to it in real life.

EIGHT

Everything in life started out as an IDEA in someone’s head.

The chair you’re sitting on, the clothes you are wearing were first an idea in someone’s mind.

You can use your mind to start an IDEA—a goal you want to reach. That’s where everything starts.

When you can truly and vividly imagine it in your mind, you’ll start to notice opportunities you might have missed otherwise

NINE

When you vividly imagine the way you want your life to go, you replace doubt, fear and insecurity with the belief that it’s possible.

Each time you continue to see yourself performing and accomplishing what you want, you feel more positive with a sense of a mission and purpose.

TEN

If you’re sick, it can make you better faster. It sounds crazy, but if you visualize your body rebuilding itself, it will begin to respond. Sort of in the same way that a hypochondriac convinces himself that he is sick, positive visualizations can improve your health.

Go to my Face Book Page to watch my latest Face Book Live that explains how visualizations help us to succeed.

You can find it  by clicking here or go to Prairie Perspectives on Face Book–click videos on left hand side and it’s the video–“Do you ever get frustrated because you get all excited to accomplish the goals you set and then before you know it–motivation dwindles and you’re back doing all the same old things again?!”

Who’s Running your Factory?

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foremanWho’s Running your Factory?

Your mind is a busy factory, producing up to 80,000 thoughts per day.

The production of your thoughts is under the charge of two foremen, one of whom we will call Mr. Triumph and the other Mr. Defeat.

Mr. Triumph is in charge of manufacturing positive thoughts, the thoughts that align with what you want in life and move you towards it.

He specializes in producing:

….Reasons why you can
….Why you’re qualified
….Why you will
….Why it’s possible

The thoughts that prove you can make it happen-all the reasons there are to believe in you, to believe in what you can accomplish, and all the reasons why you’re going to have a great day, and a great life.

Mr. Defeat, is in charge of manufacturing negative thoughts.

He produces thoughts that:

….Keep you stuck
….Hold you back
….Reasons why you can’t
….Why you’re inadequate
….Why it’s not possible
….Why you’re not good enough
….Why you’re not smart enough

His specialty is the “why you will fail” and “why it won’t get any better” chain of thoughts.

Both Mr. Triumph and Mr. Defeat are
intensely obedient!

They snap to attention immediately.

All you do to signal either of them is to give the slightest beck and call.

If the signal is positive, Mr. Triumph will step forward and go to work. Likewise, a negative signal brings Mr. Defeat forward.

Tell yourself, “Today is a lousy day.” This signals Mr. Defeat into action and he manufactures some facts to prove you are right.

He suggests to you:

….It’s too hot or it’s too cold
….Your head hurts
….You feel tired
….Your spouse is inadequate
….Your kids don’t listen
….There’s no way you can do what you need to do
….Life will never get better
….It’s too difficult

Mr. Defeat is tremendously efficient. In just a few moments he’s got you sold. Things are awful and it’s not going to get better.

But tell yourself, “Today is a great day and I’ve got so much potential to offer” and Mr. Triumph is signaled forward to act.

He tells you,
….This is a wonderful day
….It’s good to be alive.
….I’ve got challenges to conquer
….I believe in my potential
….I have so much going for me
….I’ll figure it all out

You’re now headed towards a good day.

Mr. Defeat can show you why you can’t
accomplish what you set out to do.

Mr. Triumph will show you how you can.

Mr. Defeat will convince you that you will fail while Mr. Triumph will tell you all the reasons why you will succeed.

Mr. Defeat will prepare a brilliant case for reasons why you should believe all the negatives and Mr. Triumph will prepare a brilliant case for all the reasons to believe the positives.

Now the more work you give either of these two foremen, the stronger he becomes.

If Mr. Defeat is given more work to do, he adds personnel and takes up more space in your mind.

Eventually, he will take over the entire thought-manufacturing division and virtually all thought will be of a negative nature.

The only wise thing to do is FIRE MR DEFEAT!!!!!!

You don’t need him.

You don’t want him around telling you that you can’t, you’re not up to it, and you’ll fail.

Start giving the jobs to Mr. Triumph and start letting him take over.

I can’t even give proper credit to this story as I saved it years ago–it’s always stuck in the back of my mind.

I know it was a book on Positive Thinking and I think it might have been from Norman Vincent Peale.

10 Successful Strategies to use when you’re Feeling Hopeless and Frustrated

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12338902 - a very frustrated and angry woman screaming. isolated on white.

When someone really upsets you, it’s all too easy to get overwhelmed by strong, uncomfortable feelings.

But losing control of your emotions makes responding effectively to the situation almost impossible.

So, it’s really important to have some “tools” we can practice and remember to use so we don’t ‘lose it’ and say and do things we’ll later regret.

Here, then, are 10 suggestions to practice using when you’re feeling helplessly stressed, angry and frustrated.

ONE

BREATHE-AND RELAX YOURSELF.

Your whole body tightens up and your breathing speeds up when you’re upset. So as soon as you’re aware that something negative is strongly resonating within you, take several slow, deep breaths-while repeating to yourself the word “calm” or “relax”.

This will help lower the intensity of your emotion. Slowing down your heart rate, your pulse—getting more oxygen to your muscles and organs will help lower your stress level.

Whatever you can do to relax yourself when something is deeply disturbing will help you to regain self-control. (visualize a tranquil scene such as lying on a beach while the sun shines on your body, smelling the ocean air and hearing the sound of the pleasant rhythmic waves.)

Two

IDENTIFY AND CHALLENGE THE THOUGHTS UNDERLYING YOUR UPSET.

Typically, what causes you to emotionally overreact are the exaggerated and distorted thoughts you start to believe. (the labels you put on the situation or person)

What thoughts and labels are you using that are intensifying your emotions?

Unthoughtful, stupid, dumb, ignorant, she/he’s a user, cold, miserable, uncaring, bitch, unfair, etc. Obviously these types of thoughts will intensify your stress and anger.

Ask yourself–Can I force myself [and you may really need to force yourself!] to find some positive traits in them that would help me regard them in a more favorable light-and mitigate my animosity toward them?

As tough as this is, the more you do it, the easier it will become. You will eventually find that listing any and every good thing you can think of about them (or the situation) will help to lower your frustration.

Three:

SUSPEND YOUR POINT OF VIEW-TRY TO SEE IT THROUGH THEIR EYES.

Again, when you’re upset, this can be challenging! But if you make the effort to identify with another’s viewpoint-and particularly their needs, wants, thoughts, and feelings-your upset feelings are likely to diminish.

Can you get yourself to be less self-righteous, less self-centered? Look at the bigger picture.

It can alter your thinking in ways that will soften your distressed feelings.

Four:

BECOME MORE MINDFUL.

Be like a helicopter hovering over yourself and just observe yourself. What are you feeling? Where are you feeling it? (sore head, tense shoulders, tightness in stomach, clenched fist)
Be curious, notice it, watch it-don’t judge it. Just gain awareness of the feeling.
Also, be mindful of the thoughts you’re thinking. Just notice and acknowledge them.
This awareness and observation actually helps you to accept and feel the feeling which allows you to calm yourself.

The sad consequence of getting entangled in your emotions is that your best judgment is no longer available.
It’s offline, so your ability to respond wisely to whatever set you off is seriously compromised.

Remind yourself that, regardless of the strength of your feeling-or maybe because of its strength!-you don’t need to act on it.

Five:

DON’T GET CARRIED AWAY BY THE FEELING.

We all know feelings can take over you in an instant if you let them.
The moment you’re conscious of how strong, or upsetting, your emotional reaction is, do a reality check.

Might you be overreacting because-unconsciously-what just happened reminded you of something earlier (maybe much, much earlier) that’s still negatively charged for you?
If so, bring yourself back to the here-and-now and reassess the situation as (in all probability) being less fearful, inflammatory, or hopeless than it initially seemed.
You’ll cope much better in the present if you can prevent past sensitivities from undermining your more mature, rational judgment.

Six:

DON’T CONTINUALLY FEED THE FEELING.

Stop rehearsing and repeating all the reasons you’re “entitled” to feel it-and in time it will die down.
If you keep repeating the situation in your mind over and over again, you’re intensifying it with each repetition.

You’re feeding it. Instead, tell yourself that the feeling will pass.

Seven:

TAKE FULL “OWNERSHIP” OF THE FEELING.

As long as you blame others for what, emotionally, is going on inside you, you’ll render yourself helpless to effect any change in your feeling.
It’s not about giving up your viewpoint toward another’s possible wrong-doing. It’s simply about accepting that whatever they said or did relates to themselves quite as much-or more than-it relates to you. So there’s no need to “hold onto” the words or deeds of another when they’ve made you feel bad. Since your feelings belong exclusively to you, you can change them just by reevaluating the meaning you gave to what originally provoked you.

Eight:

JOURNAL AWAY THE FEELING.

One powerful way of overcoming a distressing feeling is, through journaling. If you find yourself stewing over something, it can be extremely useful to write it out-partly as a way of clarifying and partly to console or comfort yourself.
Journaling can enable you to expand your perspective so that you find it less disturbing.

Nine:

BRING HUMOR TO THE RESCUE.

If you can prompt yourself to behold the situation that provoked you in a less serious, more comic way–then whatever you might have taken too much to heart might lessen in severity.

Ten:

NURTURE YOURSELF.

Sometimes the best way to deal with painful feelings is to be kind to yourself, to do something that makes you feel good-
work in your garden, go for walk, get a massage-whatever you can do that you truly enjoy spending your time doing.

There’s ten things to try.

Print it out and next time your emotions are taking over, grab the list and try out a few of them.

After practicing several of these, pretty soon, they’ll start to come more natural and you’ll just automatically start using them.

Wouldn’t you like to avoid a FLAT?

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flat tireQuestion…

If you had excessive wear and tear on your car tire that would cause a flat and leave you stranded, wouldn’t you want to know ahead of time so that you could be proactive and prevent it?

Of course you would.

What about your relationships?
If you were doing something that was causing excess wear and tear on your relationships, wouldn’t you want to know?

Have you ever said or done something and instantly you
just knew that you had pushed someone away?

You may have be putting excess wear and tear on your relationships without
even knowing it.

Excess wear and tear can cause relationship wrecks.

The things you think (your mindset), the things you say or the things you do can puncture holes in your relationships and gradually over time, those little holes start to negatively impact your connection with that person.
Often, it’s a slow leak that eventually leads to a flat over a period of time.
Most of us don’t take the time to find out what behaviors, words and actions may be causing excess wear and tear on our relationships.

Yet, we all have to stop using them
if we want closer, more connected relationships and
happier lives.

Here are a few examples of things that cause wear and tear:

*It can be small, seemingly
insignificant things like interrupting someone consistently
while he or she is speaking.

*It can be much bigger things like lying or
infidelity.

*It can be an accumulation of sarcastic remarks
that leave people feeling unappreciated and unloved.

*It can be you complaining about them and the way they are

*It can be keeping yourself so busy
that you don’t have time to connect with those you love.

*It can be automatically pulling away
when your loved one reaches out to hug you, pull you
close, or touch you because you’re “too busy,” “too tired,”
or “too” anything.

*It can be you being bossy and controlling that pushes them away.
*It can be you always needing to be ‘right” and not admitting when you’re wrong.
*It can you be you lecturing (going on and on)
*It can be the tone of voice you use when you’re talking.

So here’s a question for you…

What are you doing that’s causing extra wear and tear on your relationship? We all do it.

Here are a few suggestions to help you become more aware. You can’t change something that you’re not aware of.

1. Pay attention to your feelings and physical symptoms.

Look at them as indicators of what’s going on inside you that
you may need to listen to. Do you get a sinking feeling or
agitation when you talk about money with your partner or
maybe when you come home from work and see a messy
house?
Do you feel your chest pounding or your face heating up when certain situations or ways of talking come up?
Becoming aware of your feelings and physical symptoms can help you start to identify the areas that may be causing the excess wear and tear on your relationship.

Pay attention and then begin honestly addressing what is
nagging at you that you may have been ignoring.

What thoughts need to be shifted? What can you do to ease
the stress of your situation? Do you have unhealthy
expectations of yourself or of others?

2. Begin looking at how you spend your time and if you are spending your time the way you want to–in a way that’s healthy for you–according to your values and not someone else’s rules.

Living your
life according to someone else’s rules and harboring
resentments causes A LOT of excess wear and tear on your relationship!

Assess how you really want to be living your life and make a conscious choice about what’s best for you and the relationship. Are there things you need to change for you to be happy? Be proactive and make the necessary changes before you get the flat tire.

3. Pay attention to your thoughts and self-talk.

Are you constantly telling yourself negative things about
you or others in your life?

If you listen in and pay attention to your self-talk, it can
certainly be eye-opening.

What we tell ourselves does tend to manifest in our lives.

Take time to start being aware (mindful) of the things you may be doing that are causing excess wear and tear on your relationships. Then start proactively changing them before you get a FLAT and get STRANDED.

If you’re having relationship challenges of any kind
and you’d personally like some help–
Fay also offers one-on-one breakthrough relationship
coaching both in-person and via technology (phone, skype, facetime)